Job Interivew #18 - Post-Mortem

Sometimes I can tell that a job interview will go poorly right from the second I step in the front door. Yesterday was one of those days. I thought it was a bit odd that the entire office didn't have real lights. I'm serious. Each desk [well, each desk that had a person sitting @ it - which wasn't all of the desks] had it's own tiny halogen type of desk lamp. Since the office didn't have any windows [except for in the periphery offices], it was very dark in there. There was nowhere to put my coat or winter accoutrement, so I had to bring them with me into the interview, which I always find awkward. I met with two people - after being told I would just be meeting with one - so I had no clue who this second person was or what their role was in the organization. They invited me to "make myself comfortable" on a plushy red leather sofa - while they sat on opposite sides of the room away from me [so lots of shaking my head from side to side]. The sofa was very squishy - so much so that I sunk right into it - pushing my knees up really high. Not the best or most graceful/professional positions while wearing a nice interview dress/jacket.

Then there was the actual interview. Well, what there was of it, anyway. It lasted for maybe a grand total of fifteen minutes. However, when it's fifteen minutes of yourself talking super awkwardly while also in an awkward physical position...trust me, it really feels like it might be a lifetime. I dunno if I totally sucked it - I suspect that was part of the problem...but they sucked it, too. The male interviewer had a dead serious look on his face - very harsh and severe [I talked to him a bit on the phone in advance and he seemed super nice]...the female interview had a Stepford Wife type expression on her face - which made me even more nervous than the dude...it seemed like she was overcompensating for my crummy performance. I just...kept...talking...my internal monologue was screeching @ me to just shut the frak up and yet...I persisted [one thing about me - I'm stubborn]. I trailed off a few times and @ other moments I started channeling Ned Flanders - with the doodly/diddly/rooni word-esque things [once I ended an answer with - "so, yes - that is my answer to that question...right there"]. Why did this happen? Mostly I think it was because I was getting nothing from them. No visual cues, no positive [or negative, for that matter] reinforcement, no uh-huhs or whatever, no good [or bad] changes in body language...nothing @ all. So I just yammered on like an idiot. So bad.

I would say that I'm not optimistic about this one. Although I still think it's a good opportunity and if they liked me, I would probably go for it and just bring in my own lamp from home. And learn to stop talking instead of just prolonging and compounding the awkwardness by more one-sided conversation [this used to be a real problem in 96% of my job interviews - I really have it under control for the most part these days]. I heard back from Girl Guides today, but I was out finishing my xmas shopping - I think they have now spoken to all of my references, so this was likely meant to be "the" phone call - either I got the job or not. I still have questions about the role and the specifics of everything - so I'm not sure I will commit before xmas. The other interview - the media/infrastructure place - they have put their search on hold until the beginning of January, so I'm going to have to exercise my patience on everything, it would seem [which I'm so excellent @ doing].